What to Say?

I wanted to come to the computer earlier today yet, Dave forced me to take a nap for good reason. He is off work today due to the holiday. I am extremely grateful that he is home due to fatigue. This morning I felt fine after emailing a couple of friends then BANG... not so good I totally crashed. As the noon hour approached I was in no mood to cook or eat. For breakfast all I ate was a slice of poppyseed almond bread so I should have been hungry. Dave and I took turns making the smoothie, breakfast potatoes & eggs for lunch. That is one meal we love eating anytime during the day. He also made me eat a small plate. O what would I do without him? After eating I took a much needed nap while Stuart took his.

I was going to tell you this morning how the chemo cycle went this time around for it was tolerable till this morning. Some items included a mild headache Saturday morning where 500 mg. of tylenol just took the edge off. Also the constipation was not a problem till the last days. All in all chemo was tolerable for this cycle... except for todays fatigue. I cannot complain.

The LORD is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life- of whom shall I be afraid? . . . Though an army beseige me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident.
Psalm 27 1, 3

I guess taking the boys to the zoo yesterday did me in. I felt fine thankfully just moved slower than normal. I could tell a difference from previous visits. I haven't been to the zoo in about a year. The boys had fun especially Stuart. I am having problems saving my pics to the computer lately so sorry for you and me alike.

Please pray for Cole as his long time fish, Ron Jon died yesterday in a aquarium filled with a bar soap. It was so cloudy I couldn't see a thing while taking the water out. Cole is devastated. This was his first pet. A curious Stuart was involved is all I can say. ...We plan on having a burial for the fish later. My heart hurts for Cole. Long story here.

Welcome to life in the Snodgrass home
k-

WNL's

Today's bloodwork was within normal limits (WNL's). I will continue with the 350mg. of Temodar (chemo) tomorrow night into Tuesday.

Thanks for checking in...

k-

Hello

Hello All,
Last week was VBS week. What a week! Overseeing crafts for three of the days was a hoot. I felt horrible on Monday and Tuesday with what I like to call the chemo cold. I never have had so many colds as I have had in a years time. I think I am at six since February already! Aghhhhhh. Welcome to a compromised immune system.

I have been struggling with keeping up with house duties(laundry, dishes, etc). It is the multi tasking that is difficult. Dave encourages me to rest during the day. I have more energy in the morning compared to afternoons. If I do not rest I will feel it in the late evening with a ache behind my eyes. It happened last night. I had a great time attending a friends bridal shower minus resting during the day(no time). I also taught the pre K Sunday school class at church in the morning which requires energy that I so want to expend for the kingdom. I love being with the kids. God is good.

This week I have my oncologist appointment on Thursday at 11:15 am. I will also have my bloodwork done prior to the appointment as well. We will have the results at the appointment. I am trying to condense my driving due to gas prices. The less amount spent on the road the better. Chemo (350 mg. Temodar) is slated for Friday evening through Tuesday.

Please pray for Dave and I in regards to contacting others hurting with this disease. We have numerous opportunities unfortunately (for their sake). This is one club that should NOT have lots of members.

Kate

Grace & Love

Praising God for his grace and love for us! What a God!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bE2RXTBV8lM&feature=related

k-

Disappear

I was listening to a song by Matthew West tonight. A line from the song mentions...
"If you disappear would you be missed?" I was troubled with that quote. Are you or I intentional in our relationships?

Just a thought to ponder...

Daddy Day

Happy Father's

Day

Daddy Dave

Hope you had time to honor a great dad this day.

kate

God's Love for you

Today I am thinking about my last two(less than 2) years of cancer experience...

I remember the long drives of quiet Lord time in the van driving to radiation at Siteman Cancer Center (Washington University). It was a special time of conversation between the God of the universe and ME. Me of all people.

I am considering the following today...What kind of God do we have that would love me so tenderly? And that He would give me the ability to have some sort of relationship with Him? Our God is awesome! Don't you think?

Hope you see His love for you today.

k-

Celebrating the big 10!

Yes, today is Carter's tenth birthday. It is hard to imagine that he was born ten years ago. Last night we had a family dinner due to him having a ball game tonight. He will celebrate with his friends on Monday, June 9. This morning he had his birthday pancakes (a family tradition) on the "You are special" plate. Enjoy the pictures.

As for the chemo update. Cole likes to call it CHEE mo. I was exhausted. On Sunday morning at church I informed Dave that it felt like I would pass out. That was two nights worth of chemo. Tuesday night was my official last night of taking the pills for the five day round. Some constipation occured that was somewhat remedied. I cannot complain for the Temodar wasn't as horrible this time. Thank you for praying. It was appreciated and noticable.

Off to the pool this morning for some birthday splashes.

k-

Emma Grace

Please take the time to pray for my friend in Florida, Heather and her husband, Mark. Their youngest daughter, Emma Grace is needing medical help with her heart. For more information check out http://especiallyheather.com/. Be sure to read over her website especially the side bars. It is very informative. My words are lacking today for what I really want to say.


As always thanks for checking in.
k-

Good, good, not good

MRI results - good
Blood work - good
Start chemo tonight at 350 mg. - not good

Well, that is basically it! Thanks!

Who am I... I am Yours!

The following song brought much encouragement to me driving home tonight.

Who am I
by Casting Crowns

http://youtube.com/watch?v=VU_rTX23V7Q

I hope to see you tomorrow after my doctors appointment. Depending on my days events.

Appreciate

Tomorrow morning at 10:30 I will be having a MRI. I would appreciate your prayers. It is the doctors desire along with us that there will be no change from the previous scan. I honestly cannot remember when it was. I lose track after a while. Unfortunately I have so many.

My labs will be drawn at this time as well. If you remember this past cycle was an increase in my chemo dosage. I did 300 mg for four days then 180mg on the fifth day due to lack of pills in the home. Yes, prescription dilemma. I will most likely take 350mg. (already in the closet waiting) the next cycle (Friday eve) deem the doctors approval of my lab findings. My follow up doctors appointment will be on Friday at 11:30.

O the joys of cancer,
Thanks
k-

Coming to a close

School is about over for the year. The last day is Friday ending with closing chapel and a family picnic.

This afternoon the second graders are having their poetry reading. Cole is looking forward to us attending. He informed me that there will be a surprise. "Can't really tell you but it has to do about you, Mom and a poem." Hmmmmm. : ) You can be sure the video cam will be running.

Sorry I have been delinquent with my postings. It is the same ole story- my lack of multitasking since surgery. I have been distracted lately. I felt it to be unnecessary to be at the computer with things to be done in the home. Dave has been staying up late and helping with the laundry, dishes, etc. I stayed up late with him last night to help. Also for me,resting is becoming more important. It is noticable by the end of the day if I overdo it I just crash by 8:30 pm with a mild headache and good fatigue. Many thanks to my hubby for picking up the slack.

An update on Joe. I received an email last week from his neice, Kay.

"The recommendation is not to do anything at this point since Uncle Joe is not having much, if any pain. They will do a repeat PET scan in 2 months. He said the radiation onocologist expects the lesion in the lung to "decrease" in the next 2 months instead of increase. I do not know where he is pulling that knowledge from (maybe prayers). The family all seemed to be in agreement with the decision." Joe called me as well with an update. He seemed to be in good spirits. Prayer is powerful and effective.

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him. 1 John 5:14-15

FYI - If you read an obscure comment post Saturday eve into Sunday. It was good ole Spam. It ended up being 21 pages ten point font after being deleted forever.

My next MRI is Wednesday, May 28 at 10:30 in the morning. My follow up doctors appointment is Friday, May 30. I start my five day chemo regimen as well on Friday. Most likely I will do the full 350 mg if my labs looked okay from this past cycle. I am assuming they were fine.

Have a great Memorial weekend holiday.

We are so ready for summer days at the pool.

k-

A Waiter & Chef on Mother's Day

This morning was a first as I was treated to breakfast in bed. I think the idea came about last Wednesday morning. The older boys wanted pancakes for breakfast and were told that I didn't have time. It was a busy morning due to getting ready for Bible study (CBS). Unbenounced to me, Carter ended up making the pancakes all his own while Cole prepared their school lunches. What a surprise blessing for that day! I highly encouraged this behavior and told them how much I loved what they did on their own. Marbles were earned for their Gotcha jar. Carter is a great chef. He is a great in the kitchen for being nine and and a half.

On to this morning... I had a tap on my shoulder with two boys handing to me papers. They were menus for the morning. I had some choices.

Carters Menu Choices

1. pancakes

2. eggs overeasy

3. scrambled eggs

4. egg sandwich / overeasy or scrambled

5. bacon

DRINKS

1. Ornge juce

Cole's Breakfast Menu with its own cover

1. Eggs & Pancaks

2. Egg sandwhich

3. Baken and Pancaks

4. Fruite corN Pancakes

5. bakon

drinks

smothe

ornge peach mago ( for orange peach mango juice)

ornge juice

It was so cute to see the menus. I had a handsome waiter (Cole) in his robe with his specialty tablet. He was told that he is the cutest waiter I have ever had. One side of the tablet read "Hi Mom" for me to view. He took my breakfast choices. I said pancakes he said plain or chocolate chip. I was surprised by the chocolate chip option for it wasn't on any menu. "Well, chocolate chip then - just a few." He did great in serving me my orange juice in our new ice cream sundae glasses from grandpa's house. He said Opps I made a mistake. It was pretty. Though hard to drink out of in my bed. He was the one who was given the opportunity to display the food on the plate since Carter was the chef. The presentation was magnificent. I think you'll agree.

ON a side note...

Last night Dave and I were discussing what our needs were for a SAM's run later this week. I mentioned Bisquick. His ears perked up and said "We are out of Bisquick?" Yes was my response. He later stated he needed to make a Schnucks run (grocery store). I asked why and figured it out. He and I both agreed to be pleasantly surprised. I am so glad I knew for I was awake earlier than they were this morning and would have gone downstairs to the kitchen for my eats.

Dave told me today that they planned the whole thing from menus to food. He had nothing to do with it except...accept it. He said This is Happy Mother's Day not Happy Wives Day.

Carter wondered when there will be happy kids day. I laughed. That's all the time in our home. Cole when being affirmed was just beaming. Stuart thought it was either my birthday or Dave's. He wanted to eat my strawberries in my bed with me.

I couldn't ask for a better day... breakfast in bed then sweet handwritten love notes. I also loved the salmon colored geraniums to plant under our mailbox later. Todays weather has been quite wintery. YUCK! We even had to get out our winter coats for church - No thank you.

I didn't have much time Friday to post about CCS Field Day. The event was a thrill for both boys. The shirts turned out wonderfully. Stuart even had fun in the childcare department while I served. He was estactic to receive a cupcake. Yes, the joys of a three year old. Enjoy the following pics.

Update time

Before taking the time to update ya'll on the chemo increase the past five days I should not have read the previous comments. My mom aka: Soccer Gram posted a sweet remembrance comment on grandpa that I cried upon reading it. I have been sad since his passing. A normal emotion I know.

On to blog business:
Last night I completed my fifth night of chemo (Temodar). It was thought that I would do roughly 340 mg. of pills. I ended up taking 300 mg. for four nights and 180 last night due to lack of pills. If you remember we have the Temodar mail ordered. It did not come in time for the last days. I am grateful for the "easing into" the 350 mg. dosage. Since the increase dosage I noticed a good headache one night . 500 mg. of Tylenol helped. I also had mild constipation that was somewhat remedied. My first mouth sore arrived. I was given by Stuart's CBS children's leader a cancer specific mouthwash for patients taking chemo and radiation. I have yet to use it till now. With the mouth theme... After 4 hours or so I would wake with a cotton mouth/ dry mouth. I have also noticed acne on the side of my face not clearing up as quickly as it used to. I guess I need to be thankful that I am even getting acne. There has been some fatigue. It wasn't any more noticeable than previous times. I take naps daily so it was just in the evenings when I totally faltered in my energy. Unfortunately, Stuart is growing out of his naps. This has always been a hard stage for me with the older boys. Quiet time has always been enforced in our home. I just am so tired by the time I lay down my head that the enforcement is lacking. Ho hum. He did take a nap the past two days. A time of Halleliuah. (not sure I spelled that correctly)

One night during this cycle I didn't want to take the pills at 10:30 (the correct time for that night). I fell back asleep till midnight and awoken to the thought "I'd better go in and take the pills so I won't get sick due to the Zofran wearing off". I had to pray for courage at the bathroom sink to take the pills at midnight.

I told the above story to one of my friends at Cole's Monday night ball game. I received a postcard in the mail today. It brought me to tears. She was so sweet to send it to me. Her emphasis were in All caps. Thanks Melissa L. for the encouragement.

I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed,

but will have SUFFICIENT COURAGE so that now as always

Christ will be exalted in my body...
Phil 1:20

Happy Twelve

Happy 12 Years

Dave!

Joe & my pity party

Most of you who have followed my story from the beginning know about my friend Joe whom I met down at Siteman. If not see blog post December 29, 2006 "Joe" also check out January 10 and 11.

Anyway we have kept in contact with each other. We spoke to each other at Christmas and he left a message while we were in Florida. I returned his call this past Monday finding out he was going to have a CAT scan on Tuesday. He has had some back pain that felt like "pleurisy". The doctor felt it necessary to have it checked out. Since our time together at Siteman, Joe had a second cancer come to his other ear (L) . It was a different cancer than the right side. He called today at noon to inform me of Tuesdays CAT results. A spot was found on his lung. He is to see a lung doctor next Tuesday , May 6 at 8 am. I tried to be strong for him on the phone yet failed. I cried. I could tell he was trying to be strong as well. He is my friend. I feel so bad for him.

Even with his news he was able to tell me the good parts of his day. First being the sale of his home and driving to the bank to deposit the check. (Big deal as you remember driving was not going to happen post surgery at one point) The third good part of his day was that he getting together with his friends at the local Hardees. We have talked about this often- Funny stories. Lastly was that his nephews were coming for a visit/ meal. He even took the time to ask how I was doing. I told him about the chemo increase.

Here I was having a pity party about my chemo increasing today when he called. Life has been put into perspective. I need to be thankful and look for the blessings for what God has and has not allowed me to go through. Does that make sense? I am not trying to dimish Joe's pain. Here he called to give me the news and also his thankfulness of his day. Whew!

I found comfort in the following scripture today.

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.
Psalm 32:7


Please pray for me to trust God's ways and also for Joe's new journey.
kate


Also a good quote:
Don't put tomorrows clouds on todays sunshine.

Increase Dosage

Yesterdays oncologist appointment with Dr. Needles brought a change in my chemo dosage. The Temodar (chemo) regimen has been increased from 260 to 350mg starting tonight. Continue the five days on, twenty three off. The previous 260mg. was a maintenance dosage. My labs have done well with them for the past three cycles. The 350mg increase could mean an increase in side effects expecially fatigue. Tonight I will be doing a little less than 350 due to not having enough pills in the home. We normally have the Temodar mail ordered. Dave will be helping me to calculate the five day dosage with the remaining pills. It most likely will be 340 each night.

I am fearful with the increase. I dread taking chemo. My heart is not in it. I only take the Temodar because I promised Carter long ago that "I would do whatever it took to combat the cancer if that meant chemo then so be it".

I am scheduled to have another MRI prior to May 30 when I see Dr. Needles again.

Thanks for listening to my concerns.
kate

On the Cancer Front...

I just realized this morning that I haven't given much information on the blog relating to my cancer lately. I guess that is good yet I do want to keep you informed.

For now I am going to lay it all out. Please know I am not complaining just listing details.

1. Labs drawn today for Thursday oncology appointment.

2. Doctors appointment is a follow up.

3. Start oral chemo (Temodar) Friday for 5 days on 23 off.

4. Rash on both sides of bellybutton due to chemo build up.

5. Some constipation. Early morning pain on lower left pelvic continues. OBgyn checked it out in February. No worries with ovaries. Must be from chemo induced constipation. Lovely.

6. Occasional forgetfulness due to surgery or chemo. Poor Dave has to do follow up.

7. Hair - What do I say? It's not how I would style it...yet this isn't about what I want. Is it? Ok. My hair is slowly thinning out - might be due to chemo or normal life stuff. It is also growing in slowly where the surgery took place in December. I have a good two inches that loves to stick up straight (spike) if not trained in the morning. Scary!

8. Physically & Emotionally- I am getting better since the trauma of post surgical complications (not much usage of left extremities) Ok NO usage of left extremities including the facial muscles. But, by God's grace I am somewhat back to normal. I was downtrodden for a while. Short story comprehension is difficult. I especially notice it with my Bible study. It is slowly getting better. Speech therapy aided in the comprehension. I currently see a counselor. I think everyone should see counselors. It is a broken sin filled world. I also think about not being here for my family in the years to come. The thought is short lived. Please pray that I do not dwell on the "what ifs".

9. Multi-tasking: is difficult but getting better. Cooking has been minimal. Many thanks to the meals still being provided occasionally. Driving skills have improved but, reversing out of a parking spot requires both sides of the brain. Difficult. Not impossible. I really have to focus. I also have noticed when multiple conversations are occuring while I am speaking to someone, I am overwhelmed. Thankfully Covenant Christian School's Field Day is not my respondsiblility this May. Allthough I did oversee the team shirt design and colors. That was fun and DO able. I missed organizing the event but, it was good for my health not to oversee the planning, games, volunteers, etc. Also good to let some things go. Laurie I am sure did a fantastic job. Can't wait for Friday, May 9. She is a blessing.

Thanks for caring...
kate

Sand in Suit & Trunks 08'

Carter's adventures
Cole looking for shells
Stuart looking onward

Yes, we just returned from our family vacation. Time away was good yet, I find myself "hitting the floor with my feet running" since we have returned. Lots to do on the homefront.

The beach was fantastic! Real Florida orange juice is truly liquid gold. We devoured a gallon and a half. The above pics are the fairly decent shots I was able to take one day. I would have taken a group picture if I had known the camera was going to be a problem. My camera unfortunately decided not to work later in the week. Bummer for the sunset pics.

This year my mom was able to join us. She needed a vacation. Not sure if it was a quiet one with all the boys. Ok- You and I know it wasn't quiet in the home. Yet, somehow the beach drowns out most noises with the waves and wind.

Carter had fun trying out the skim board. I have to say I would have busted my rear if I would attempt to skim. Dave tried it - fun to watch him. He couldn't skim as well as Carter and his excuse was the board was not long enough. Probably the case. Cole loved to boogy board. And little Stu just had fun "fishing" with the old reeds. The beach is one big sandbox. He also wanted to come back to "Stoo rts house" to ride his bike once we were into our 3rd day of 7. He just loves to ride his bike in our cul de sac. We recently put training wheels on the hand me down bike. He can't get enough bike time. He even rode today in the slow rain after nap time with me walking briskly beside him.

Not sure if I told you . . .I had some intermittent pain on the right side of my head prior to vacation and started back on some nerve pain meds (Lyrica). I think it was due to stress of grandpa's passing and packing for the family. Thankfully not much pain while away . I was able to enjoy Florida pain free! Just a little tired though (not complaining).

I will try to update some more on our trip as time permits. Be sure to look at this post in the near future for the updates.

Off to make dinner.

Just wanted to let you know where I have been.

kate

happy birthday dave!

Happy Birthday

Dave!

I awoke this morning around the 4:30 hour to the bed shaking. I thought it was one of the boys who were shaking the bed. (They've never have done that before so not sure why I thunked it.) Anyhooo...I immediately palmed Dave and woke him up asking him "What is going on?" Not sure what had happened we went downstairs after the rumbling. I checked on the garage thinking it could have done something weird. Turned on the TV. Nothing. Looked outside the sliding door. Nothing. We assumed it was an earthquake. Dave stated lets go back to bed. Back to bed?! How could I sleep after knowing an earthquake most likely occured?

Later it was told that a 5.2 earthquake did occur in southern Illinois. We felt it. I am sure we weren't the only ones. How about you?

Happy Birthday to my rumblin' kind of guy.
Off to purchase some delightful treats for the evening.
kate

Remembering grandpa

Grandpa's memorial was sweet last Sunday. When his eulogy was given there were things about him that I didn't know. It was good to hear. The visitation was from 2-4 pm. The memorial service started around 4:15 and went till 5 ish. Afterwards an extended family dinner was given. Many thanks to my mom's church for providing the food. Also thank you to Aunt Lindas womens group for the yummy desserts. The buttermilk pie was too good. Cousin Corrie and I had our fill that's for sure.

Carter and Cole were told of grandpas passing Friday evening. Cole immediately cried to my surprise. Carter didn't outwardly express his feelings till later. This was a reverse of what I told you earlier. We are pleased that they are talking to us about the whole situation. Many questions are being asked. To the best of our ability we have answered them openly. It was hard for me after the memorial getting into the car to find the both of them crying profusely. They held it in during the four hour service without crying in front of others yet let it out in the car. I started to cry thinking of their feelings if I were the one who passed away. It was hard. As for Stuart he stayed at home with some friends of ours it was during his nap time and would prove to be too long of a day. It also would be hard to corral a three year old in a small funeral home room. That would of been on Dave's shoulders since I was saying hello to many people. On that front...Many people came that I hadn't seen since childhood. I knew for when they said "Katie" that was when people knew me from early years. I changed to Kate in junior high. It was good.

Busy in the home preparing for Dave's Friday birthday among other things.

Marion Lee

I received a call at 6:15 am from my mom letting me know that my grandpa passed away at 3:30 this morning in the hospital. His congestive heart failure caused his heart to just stop. I am sad. We will no longer hear those long time ago stories. That generation in our family is gone. Grandma passed away unexpectantly of a heart attack 5 years ago in April.

A memorial/visitation will be held Sunday from 2-5 pm in Washington, Missouri. He had already planned long ago to donate his body to SLU.

We decided to tell the older boys after school about great grandpa so they can process the information over the weekend with us. Please pray they process his death well. Cole internalizes things. Carter wears his emotions on his sleeve. I am concerned about both.

I am just sad. Grandpa was like a father to me. He came home early from work to immobilize my arm after I broke it at his home on Purina Farms. I even cut wood with him in the back woods of the farm. I had a competition with him on who could carry the heaviest log to his truck. I have wonderful childhood memories. I am thankful I had so many years (into adulthood) with my grandparents. It is a blessing.

Today has been a day of rememberance. I look forward to digging into pictures for his Sundday memorial later.

Marion Lee Johnson was a grandpa who loved me. He will be missed.

kate

Not Much

Good News. I am here to report that not much is going on. The retreat was enjoyable and fun/exhausting to get away. My side effects from this round of Temodar are minimal. Not much to report.

My grandpa is not doing well. He was admitted in the hospital yesterday. The cogestive heart failure is taking a toll on his body. Thank you for taking the time to pray.
k-

What is love?

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

The above passage has been in my mind. I have been pondering what it means to truly love. I am not perfect. It is difficult to love like Christ but not impossible.

Today is the first of my chemo regimen. I think it is the 3rd series. My weekend retreat starts today as well.

Pondering this as well. http://youtube.com/watch?v=Oad8ov10AjY
I am lost without Jesus.

Gotta run errands & pack!
k-

More Info.

Ok- Why didn't I just say that the MRI results were inconclusive like my mom explained to a friend of hers earlier? That would of been easier. Don't you think?

After todays visit with Dr. Needles and the unsettled word on the scan I contacted Dr Forget for his opinion and he was able to explain the inconclusive report.

Dr. Forget said not to worry as with any brain surgery like mine there is raw surface of brain that is exposed after the tumor area was taken out. Ok - the whole frontal anterior portion of my brain is gone! That is alot of exposure. He explained that the raw surface of brain is lined with a material called surgicel, a hemostatic agent (like an interior band-aid for my brain - my wording not his). The unexplained "cyst" is most likely a blood vessel, scar tissue or the surgicel material. While he was reviewing my scan Dr. Backer, a colleague asked him what he was looking at. Dr. Backer said that he thought it looked great. There's no tumor there. Dr. Forget said, "I couldn't be happier with the MRI. Now you have two neurosurgeon opinions."

All is well. To think I actually forgot I had an appointment earlier today. Yes, I actually forgot my follow up was for today. I even called my sister, Jean to confirm she was coming over to watch Stu. She said she didn't forget. Whew!

I will wait to hear from Dr. Needles as to what he wants to do from here. I will continue with my chemo regimen this Friday of 5 days on, 23 off. I have bloodwork on the 21st day of the cycle. Another MRI most likely will occur in about two months.

Looking forward to a womens retreat this weekend,
k-

Mixed Review

Todays visit to Dr. Needles was somewhat hard to put into words. I am still trying to wrap my thoughts around it all. It wasn't a bad visit just confusing to me.

We discussed to a degree the results of yesterdays MRI. Dr. Needles wants to speak with Dr. Forget about the report. The wording of the scan report is not what Dr. Needles is comfortable with. It could be surgical healing scar tissue . Overall Dave said to me"not to worry about it as we know surgery is not an option".

I might take the time to write out the actual report later. For now, I am waiting on a call from either Forget or Needles as to where to go next. Another test?

If I could... I would write more. My typing is so slow. That is all I can come up with. I will need to write this down manually and look it over prior to coming to the computer to type. Gotta go and pick up the older boys at school. Carter could have a ball game tonight.

My WBC's count is a little low in but, not too concerning at this time.

I will continue with the 260mg of Temodar this Friday. Five days on 23 off.

Pics pics & more pics

Even though we have been sick most of spring break, we were able to have fun times in front of the TV watching NCAA basketball. The boys seem to want the Memphis Tigers to win. While out for fun today they had their faces painted. Carter went for the "Memphis" written across his forehead. Cole was more on the wild side. This surprised me as he is not one for stuff on his face. The tiger face only lasted till Stu awoke from his late nap.

Be sure to check out the Easter pics on the Monday, March 24 "Hello" post.

A Sickly Pair

Well, Dave and I did get this sickly bug early this morning. We were a sight later this afternoon lying in the bed.

My MRI at 11:45 this morning was rescheduled to Monday the 31st at 9:45. Can you imagine being sick in a MRI tube? No thanks. This is the second MRI since the December 12, 2007 surgery. My doctors appointment is on Tuesday.

Carter (Dr. or nurse Carter) did a fine job today in our home taking care of everyone. He even made Stuarts breakfast of wafflesand served me pedialyte. That stuff tastes awful.

Stuart is struggling with diarrhea today. He is more stable, though. Pray that his bowels solidify.

I'd take brain surgery over this stomach bug anyday!
k-

The 4 o'clock Flu

Yesterday (Thursday) morning around 4:45 Cole awoke with the vomiting. This was dejavue to the 4:30 AM Tuesday episode with Carter. Yet, Cole gave us an alarm wakening by bursting into our room to say "I'm throwing up!" He ran back to their bathroom and made it just in time to the toilet. Flipping the blanket off the bed I hurried to help him. While in the bathroom, Dave said "I guess we need to call this the 4 o'clock flu." The only problem with that one is that at the ER they tested Carter for the official flu and it was negative. It must be some awful stomach bug.

Stuart woke up sometime around 6 AM with odd crying and I swept him into my arms held him close as a three year old does not know how to handle vomit. I could care less about my pajama top. It can be washed. Stuart calls his vomiting "I spit up." We ended up training him on the official throw up bowl that the boys carry around the home when sick and away from a bathroom.

It was one crazy morning, Cole stayed up in his room on the third floor while Stu was down on the second floor couch. I was coaxing Cole to come to the couch so I could be with them both and not run up and down the stairs checking on each of them. He was concerned about walking. I think he wanted to bring his beloved bed belongings to the couch so I asked. He did. His special blanket and pillow went to the couch. All was better so I could be with them on one level.

Cole ended up getting over the buggie by noon. Fluids were staying down. Yet obviously rest was needed. Stuart not so blessed. He was concerning me. Dehydration looked near at the noon hour. Fluids were not staying down. When he awoke from his nap I called the pediatrician. We arrived at the office for a peace of mind. Dr. McKinney is off on Thursdays so Dr. Joe took his patients. We ended up "testing" his vomit. Stuart received in the exam room a trial size Pedialyte and was given a tablespoon of fluid every five minutes on the clock. If he could hold it down in thirty minutes we could go home if not...ER would be in the future. His eyes were sucken and he could of benefitted from an IV yet it wasn't absolutely necessary per Dr. Joe. I agreed as Stuart was being more himself in the exam room.

Don't you know? They almost always perk up by the time you arrive to the pediatrician. I didn't mind for I wasn't looking forward to another ER visit.

In the van returning home, Cole expressed his thankfulness of having beds and couches to rest on. I was thankful that the bug came after 4 in the morning so a good nights sleep wasn't hindered as much. Two o'clock would be a different story.

Today was a good day as we had some sweet time together. The older boys have been bummed that their spring break wasn't all that they had desired. We did not go to Nascar Speedpark like we had planned for Tuesday and cancelled a Thursday playdate with friends we hadn't seen in a while. Tuesday was too cold anyway. Oh well, there are other fun days ahead.

Last night didn't lend itself to a post. Go figure!

Almost forgot... I have a MRI tomorrow (Saturday) at 11:45 in the morning. My follow up oncologist appointment is on Monday, April 1 with labs taken prior to that time.

Just being a mom,

kate

What A Day

4 am I awoke with an odd sound down the hallway. The boys bathroom light was on and as I was getting closer the sound was more familiar. It was vomiting. Poor Carter was up. A nice colorful rust color splotch on the carpet was outside the bathroom. (We had red sauce for dinner) Unfortunately he did not make it to the tile in time. What a surprise to him and I. He was feeling fine at bedtime. After some clean up we both tried to get some sleep yet- unsuccessful. Carter threw up less than an hour later. No thanks to the water he had after the 4 am event. It obviously didn't settle well in his tummy. The vomit cycle was about every 30 to 40 minutes. He was up along with I till Stuie awoke around 7:30. Little Stu laid in bed with an exhausted Mommy. We eventually made our way downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. Cole awoke as well for food. Carter was given ice chips as he wasn't desiring food - understandably. He kept vomiting after any type of liquid. Many thanks to our neighbor, Jennifer for helping with the carpet clean up. I think we need to think about investing in a steam cleaner. I had called her to see if she would stay at our home (I didn't want Carter to leave the house) so I could run to the store to rent a steam cleaner and she so graciously offered her green machine. I think that was the name of it. Also thanks to Ramona for picking up some Pedialyte. It is not fun to go shopping with three kids in tow especiallywith one being a sickly child. Carter was worsening in his sickness hour by hour. By 10:45 the bowels started moving a little too quickly(if you know what I mean). No fever thankfully. At lunchtime a decision was made to take him to the ER for IV fluids as he was crying with no tears.

Topping things off...Dave was in Texas on a business trip. I was in a quandary in trying to find someone ASAP to help with Cole and Stuart. I was being sensitive to the possiblity of Carter having the flu and not wanting to expose another family.

OK back to the ER...
We arrived after a fast lunch for Cole, Stuart and myself. The hospital staff questioned Carter about his pain, ailments, etc. He was complaining about a headache and feeling"woosy". His right arm was hurting as well as his stomach ("6" on the pain scale). He so wanted a drink for he was thirsty, yet afraid to throw up due to hurting.

After many questions I asked if they were thinking appendicitis. They said yes, yet no fever is a good sign among other things. His bloodwork showed elevated WBC's which is normal I assume for a virus. He was given Zofran in the IV for his naseau. I also requested the flu test to be performed. We ended with an x-ray.

We came home by dinner time with an exhausted Carter. He went to bed after a bland meal.

The flu was negative. He just had some bug today. Stomach rating by him a "2" by the time we left. Hopefully no one else will get it.

Kudos to Cole for his help in packing a fun backpack for the hospital. Stuart and him were very well behaved. Even the nurse spoke highly of their behavior. I attribute some of it to Cole along with a TV in the room.

It was my first time at the Missouri Baptist pediatric ER and it was wonderful.

So glad Dave is home.

Needing some rest,

kate

Hello

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ,
set your hearts on things above,
where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.
Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.
For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.
When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

Colossians 3:1-4

I hope you had a blessed Easter. I had wanted to write but, time again did not permit me to do so. Dave has been somewhat fatigued the past few weekends. Family along with work are wearing him out. He will be travelling out of state sometime this week.

I will try to post some pics from Easter service at church with the boys. The above passage was from our service. It was so compelling. I would not do it justice by giving you the notes. I will have to download the sermon to hear it again.

Carter received for the first time last week some eye glasses. I really wanted to post that. It is odd seeing him with glasses. He loves them and protects them. He is wanting contacts prior to baseball season officially starting as he is a pitcher and the glasses feel odd with a hat(so he says).

Spring break for Carter and Cole started on Good Friday and runs all this week. We are hoping for good weather so we can do some outside activities around town. They really want to do Nascar Speedpark at the Mills Mall which is a good 45 minute drive. They have go-carts inside and out along with some games inside. It is difficult to take a toddler to this as I will need a sitter for Stu.

My mom is currently taking care of my grandpa whose congestive heart failure is taking its toll on his body.

Not as planned

Last night after Cole's party I was exhausted. I had hoped to post some pics for you yet went to bed early. Dave ended up waking me for my pills, Zofran wait an hour then the last day 5/5 for second round of chemo. This morning has not gone as planned. Noticing the fish tank was filled with gunky food...Stuart arrived. While I was overseeing the problem with an empty food container he stated "I feed fish tank, Mommy." "I see Stu." He was up at 2 am turning on all hallway lights and I wonder if he fed the fish at that time while he was getting a drink in the boys bathroom. I think he was getting a drink. Dave wondered early this morning (prior to finding out about the tank fiasco) if he was sleepwalking. I rule out sleepwalking. We had fast food last night. It was Cole's choice in the dinner he wanted. Cheeseburgers and cheese fries. Salty for us. Ooooooooo but good. We needed our potassium this morning for sure to aid in the sodium intake last night.

This morning was spent cleaning a fish tank and taking a late shower. Not something I wanted to do so early in the morning (shower yes, fish tank no) with an upset stomach. The fish tank smelled awful! I had just drank my morning smoothie. Yuck! Double yuck.

As for the second round chemo (Temodar) effects, it consisted of a crampy stomach early in the morning, fatigue throughout day but not as bad as Saturday the 8th. A rash is here as well but in a different location.

Enough said here are the pics from Cole's special day! I especially love the close up picture with his Lego Bionicle toys. Notice his chocolate lip with Mommy and Daddy. The choco chip cookie cake was wonderful!

Happy 8th, Cole

Happy Birthday

Cole

is

8

We are looking forward to a kid party after school today. I will try to post some pics later on. Keep checking in.

kate

Expelled Documentary

This is a documentary that supposedly will be out in April. It interested me. We were informed of it the other night.

http://expelledthemovie.com/video.php

Like to know your honest thoughts.

Kate

Fatigue sets in

Last night, the second round of chemo cycle was started. Fatigue set in this morning. I fed the boys their Saturday morning breakfast at 7:15. Took my shower. Went back to bed. I stayed there for four hours starting at 9:30ish. As a morning person, I tend to be more productive around the home during these hours of the day. I awoke from my fatigue to a personal "to do" list. I am more and more thankful for the hot meals people have so lovingly served us on various evenings. My energy level has been lacking in the kitchen arena. Keeping pantry and fridge items stocked along with meal planning has been a challenge.

With this fatigue today, I relunctantly stepped down from chaperoning Carter's upcomingThursday field trip. I sent an email to his teacher.

Today has been a quiet Saturday at home. Basketball season unfortunately has ended. Baseball has started yet, cancelled today. Not sure why, might have been due to weather. Whatever the case, God knew what kind of morning I was going to have.

Please pray for Dave. Holding up the fort is a big task when I am down.

Thanks for hanging with us on this one.

k-

Professional Motherhood

The following website offers encouragement to mothers. Press play audio to hear Jill Savage's 30 minute message given through Focus on the Family.

http://www.oneplace.com/Ministries/Focus_on_the_Family/Default.asp

Every Mother's Prayer

author unknown

Dear Lord, it's such a hectic day,

With little time to stop and pray,

For life's been anything but calm,

Since you called on me to be a mom.

Running errands, matching socks,

Building dreams with building blocks.

Cooking, cleaning, and finding shoes,

And other stuff that children lose.

Fitting lids on bottled bugs,

Wiping tears and giving hugs.

A stack of last week's mail to read,

So where's the quiet time I need?

Yet when I steal a minute Lord,

Just at the sink or ironing board,

To ask the blessings of your grace,

I see them in my small one's face,

That you have blessed me all the while,
As I stop to kiss that precious smile.

Round 1 updated results

My current oncologist, Dr. Needles, appointment was today at 11:45. As for the updated results from round 1 of chemo: Bloodwork looks good. A follow up MRI will occur towards the end of March with my next doctors appointment on Monday, March 31. The kicker of it all - I have gained 8lbs. since January 3. Aghhh! I knew my pants were not fitting well lately. I attribute it to slacking on the strict personal diet of no sweets. Yes, sweets have been introduced. My body is showing signs of it. Especially in my complexion a few days following the indulgence.

I will be starting oral chemo, Temodar, this Friday, March 7 for five consecutive days.

We are contemplating some changes regarding medical doctors. Please pray for wisdom.

k-

Short & Sweet

I am hopefully going to make this post short and sweet with minimal words. Just wanting to update you on certain details.

1. Cole was able to see by surprise his long time friend, Drew, Friday after school for a few hours.

2. Outpatient therapy for me should be totally complete with a plethora of HEP's (home exercise program) incorporating the usage of the left side hand/shoulder, feet/leg and involving putty,therabands, and a therasponge, some manual balance, also muscles not knowing I ever had. Please pray for time management.

3. It seems evident after the second surgery my ability to divide my attention/ multi tasking is difficult. I will try to give some specific examples later. Please do not hesitate to remind me in a post comment in a few weeks.

4.This afternoon Carter, Cole and I enjoyed the great spring like temperature outside with a long bike ride. I was thankful due to a longing I had a few weeks ago in taking the boys on a bike ride but knowing I would have been unable with my left sided limitations. It was good to be out enjoying the day after a short nap.

5. Had bloodwork taken this morning. The results to be known on Monday at oncologist, Dr. Needles, appointment. Will start 5 day oral chemo, Temodar on Friday, March 7 if he deems necessary. (depending on the blood counts)

Short and sweet,- hope you are doing well.
k-

Fever

Cole woke me early this morning at 2:00 with a fever. After the thermometer read 102.2 he quickly received tylenol. I was bummed for him in the possibility of not seeing today his "best friend" since Pre-K, Drew. He and his family are in town this week from Louisiana. We were planning an evening dinner for quite some time. I had a time with the Lord after tending to Cole just asking why He allowed for him to have this fever for such a time as this? Cole has had so much discouragement lately and was overly excited to see Drew then downtrodden upon waking to the point of crying. What heartache. Carter was also discouraged early this morning for he was looking forward to having people over. We haven't had many families over since surgery - for that matter we haven't had anyone. I guess we need to work on it. We strive during the summer to invite one family over a week to get to know them. It has been great to do. Life has just been for us. . . hmmmmmm. . . preoccupied. After calling Drew's mom early this morning she mentioned the possibility of hooking up prior to them leaving town by Saturday. We pray that Cole's fever will be short lived. Also that no one in the Snodgrass clan to be ill any time soon.



I have noticed on the cancer front that during the day I experience a headache behind the eyes. Toward evening, I will take tylenol to combat if it is bad enough. I am also tired. I'm not sleeping thoroughly through the night even with the sleeping pill.- Too much on my mind- (or should I say not much IN my mind?)- sorry bad joke.



k-

Graduating

Today was the official last day of physical & occupational therapy. I will possibly have my discharge evaluation for speech therapy this Thursday. My physical therapist, Wendy yelled across the gym"Happy Graduating" as I was walking out. I told her I wasn't gone just yet till I see the speech therapist recommendations. I am just thrilled to be in decent arm and leg muscle shape since surgery. I am somewhat normal. Ha ha ha- You say I will never be normal. I agree.

Insurance pays for X amount of visits per calendar year for each therapy session. We are allowing a buffer of five PT /OT visits to be used for the remainder of the year if needed. I can also go in to workout under their watchful eye for a standard fee.

I had a great conversation this morning with a fellow therapy gym patient, Justin, who has had no usage of his lower extremities since November 07, he also was a patient in the therapy hospital during my stay as well. I never had a chance to have a conversation till now. Just a jealous smile of his wheelchair skills. I told him that today! He was such a fast one down the hall while I was not. Here's Kate just tooDaLing in her wheelchair slowly running into the walls getting her insurance worth. Justin told me today he thought I was a therapist. I just laughed and said thanks for I wasn't. Able to share about my left sided weakness being a zero since surgery. It is good to be in the therapy gym as people are real. Hurting like me.

I see oncologist, Dr. Needles early next week sometime. I had some calendar confusion this Friday. Labs will be closer to the dr.'s appointment. The five days of oral Temodar (chemo) pills will be taken later in the week. I'm not in front of the calendar as I write this so I cannot give you the exact date. The 23 days off went by too quickly.

Thankful for today. It was a good day.

kate with a mild headache, cough & needing some rest

Pondering

Since my last post, I have been pondering how to delicately word what a long time friend is dealing with in Texas. I had her information in hand since I wrote my last blog and couldn't seem to allow myself to complain about my situation with chemo. I personally struggled through my last series of the oral pills. The headache was more than what I wanted to endure. My friend is going to have to endure more in the next few weeks. She had found out that her cancer (orginally in breast) is now in her liver and will be changing her chemo regimen to be more aggressive. In turn, causing her hair to completely come out again, severe fatigue, finger and toe nail beds to lift off from the skin. Losing hair is a huge battle for she states: "When you have hair, you don't feel like you're sick. But when you lose your hair and everyone starts staring, you start to feel like you're sick. It becomes a much harder mental battle when you look in the mirror and all your hair is gone."

I am choosing not to tell you her name for privacy reasons. You can pray - for God knows who she is.

I hate cancer!
k-

Update Ta Da

Ta Da I'm Back! Once again it has been difficult to find time and write a blog post. My mom, Gram decided last weekend it was appropriate for her to return to Franklin county in tending to grandpas needs. She will be coming to help in our home during various weekdays- weather pending.

I did have my first round of chemo this past weekend and overall it was not pleasant. I will list some of the unpleasantness below:

1. A good headache on Friday evening.

2. Cramping throughout the five days

3. Rash near bellybutton

More side effects were experienced.

The chemo(Temodar) will be doing it's work the remainder of this month. I am to have labs on Thursday the 28th and see oncologist, Dr. Needles the day after.

Thanks for checking in...kate

Therapy Evaluation

Boy, time is a hot commodity around here. I had a post written on paper this past Monday, February 4 and haven't had the time to sit down at the computer to update ya'll. Stuart came down with a fever over the weekend then Carter followed. Ok.....

Pretend this was written on Monday, February 4 -

Today was my one month (30 days) therapy evaluation.

OT (occupational therapy) and PT (physical therapy) have shown improvements with therapist goals reached. I also have noticed improvements.

My outpatient therepay regimen will change from 3x daily one hour each to 2x daily still at one hour. Speech will continue 2x daily at one hour. The speech therapy is working on cognitive processing. I was thrilled to have the OT & PT change for two specific reasons.
1. Muscle improvement is noticeably significant
2. Snodgrass calendar to be simplified

As for driving, I have the written report but, need an oral "Ok" from my rehab doctor, Dr. Ahmad. I called this afternoon to get the ball rolling in hopes to catch him. I was told the report was put on his desk last Friday and he might get back to me by next Monday. I emphasized the importance of hearing from him to the gal. Life would be much easier if I drove. Please pray that the doctor will call prior to next Monday (He called yesterday & I was cleared!) .

I will be starting chemo (Temodar) this Friday. The top possible side effects are fatigue, naseau,constipation and adverse impact on white & red blood cell counts. Zofran will be taken in advance to combat the naseau. Temodar is specific to brain cancers and normally does not cause hair loss. My chemo schedule is as such 5 days on 23 off. Repeat till Dr. Needles, oncologist deems necessary. Please pray as it looks as if I will be on chemo during Cole's birthday in March and our anniversary in May. I obviously prefer the side effects to be minimal. Obsolete Lord willing.


Thankful I am alive and driving, (I need to write to you about a God print while I was driving the other day!)
kate

A Snowy Beach

A view from Mom & Dad's bedroom
Posing for the camera

The pictures explain it all with the construction trucks. Cole called it his snowy beach and asked that I title the blog with that. I, however wanted to title it "A Snowlot" for Sandlot. Yes, it was SNOW FriDAY for our family. Dave even ended up being at home due to his work shutting down the office prior to him leaving the home unfortunately not early enough as he along with the older boys shoveled the 5" of snow that fell last night. Carter & Cole were up by 6 am this morning they cannot seem to sleep in. Our alarm went off at 5:45 and Dave noticed that the light was on in Cole's room in which they share at this time. They were listening to "Jonathon Park", an audio adventure series that they are engaged in from vision forum.com "The Jonathon Park project provides children and adults with scientific evidence that is in harmony with the Word of God. This is our Father's world, God created it; we can explore it, so live the adventure!" I have to say it is quite engaging for me as well. Very thought provoking. We noticed late fall that a new series was available so it was given at Christmas to both. Cole thanked me at bedtime last night for the newest series. Each series has somewhere between twelve episodes on four compact discs coming close to five hours. Time well spent in our opinion. After sledding today we would find each boy upstairs listening to the audio series for their warm up breaks. Carter was even privileged to eat his homemade sticky bun upstairs. Many thanks to grandma (Gram to ya'll).

Gram currently left for her weekend break from us. She normally leaves on Friday and returns on Sunday evenings.She needs to be able to get away from three young kids. I along with Dave are very thankful for her. She is a early morning riser as well. Cole seems to think she treats them like kings at breakfast time. I have agreed. She has made corncakes which appeals to their adventure of possibly living during Little House on the Prairie times. It has been fun to smell and watch her sour dough starter. The boys call it a science experiment for it takes days of preparation fizzing involved for those of you who don't know. Not long ago blueberry waffles were prepared on her waffle maker with blueberry topping. This morning grits were on the table after shoveling the driveway. They haven't had their eyes or stomachs introduced to them (grits). I told the boys to enjoy this time they have with her here. For the weekend is "look in the freezer for Trader Joe waffles" while Dave makes our smoothies. I will make eggs for some protein power.

Kings don't you think?

k-