For my benefit

17 - Surely it was for my benefit

that I suffered such anguish.

In your love you kept me

from the pit of destruction;

you have put all my sins

behind your back.

18 - For the grave cannot praise you,

death cannot sing your praise;

those who go down to the pit

cannot hope for your faithfulness.

19 - The living, the living -- they praise you,

as I am doing today;

fathers tell their children

about your faithfulness.

Isaiah 38:17-19

This week I have been studying the life of king Hezekiah. I am amazed more and more how scripture is so alive. I love just digging deeper and deeper only to find more nuggets of great stuff! Sad to say it has taken me YEARS to come to studying like this. God is patient.

Hezekiah's heart was proud as stated in 2 Chronicles 32:25. I see a great resemblance in me as well. (Of course, I don't know what human is not proud in one way or another if we are honest with each other.) Being prideful and having brain cancer - I really love verse 17 above on how Hezekiah's illness was for his benefit. I am seeing that cancer is nothing but for my benefit. Major refining going on at this home. Hurts at times but beneficial and necessary.

The "Ah hah" moments with God are wonderful. Just two nights ago I came to a small, very miniscule, tiny (You get the point!) realization of why I was privileged to study I Peter in the fall of 2006 and Daniel this past spring. A portion of I Peter deals with the inner beauty of a person. One of Daniel focuses is the Babylonian empire which basically resembles the western culture today. With having cancer I have been so transfixed on how I looked on the outside particularly the hair! More and more God is centering my focus to the inward. It is a daily sometime hourly task.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold and jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of you inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

I Peter 3:3-4

Ok, you are not going to see me wearing sack cloth anytime soon. I do think it is very appropriate for me to be looking my best but it shouldn't be everything about who I am as a person- as a child of the King. I think you understand where I am coming from.

I am so excited about my upcoming fall / spring study with Community Bible Study (CBS). They will cover the The Divided Kingdom and the Minor Prophets: I & II Kings, Hosea, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk and Zephaniah. Whew! I have never studied any of these. If I may I will be quoting Beth Moore. "My brain will be hurting after this study!" Can't wait for it to begin in the fall. Stuart will love going as well for they have a great childrens ministry.

I am continuing to read Heaven by Randy Alcorn this summer. It's great and hurting my brain as well. The only bummer is that I left it at my eye doctors appointment today downtown. I am planning on picking it up on Friday at the St. Lukes location. They were willing to send it there with records. Hmmmm, I wonder if anyone will look at it. I have plenty of notes in there to ponder.

As for todays eye appointment everything is looking good. I am far sighted but nothing to worry about at this time. Dr. Cohen says my eyes are still young that I don't notice the far sightedness. A little boost to the ego. : ) He wants to see me every 6 months to follow my eye care for any signs of radiation complications. My next appointment is in late December. Low and behold I had seen him in 2000 and didn't remember for it was at the St. Lukes office. I am sure I have seen an ophthamologist since 2000 but not sure where or when it was. If it was my kids I could tell you what doctors they have seen but not me. Tells you where I choose to remember things.

Thanking God for my vision. Not just vision to see things but to see Him more clearly as well. I am sure there is a good quote for that one. If you know it - post it.

Today was a good day!