Friday, January 12, 2007

Falling Has Begun

My hair is officially fallling out. My heart aches this morning after my shower. I was crying alot. Please pray for strength TODAY. I am always guaranteed that His mercies are new every morning. I did not expect for such a quick trial this early in the day. I am discouraged. Please pray also for wisdom on how I should deal with my hair. My two options are as follows:

1. Wait till the section is all bald. See how much falls out & see if the headband scarves will cover the empty space. Then wait the 2+ months in partial baldness prior to cutting my hair short to match the regrowth. They say it will take a good 2 -3 months before any new growth occurs.

2. Cut my hair really short now. Wear hats & scarves now. I have concluded that I will need to go "Butch" at some time in the near future. (No offense to any women who have short hair.)

It says in the Bible that a womens hair is her glory. I love my hair. I love my boys more. Aghhhh! This is a major trial with just the hair. I am willing to only do it for my boys. My heart is breaking. I did not sign up for the cancer hair loss club.


Now to him who is able to strengthen you according to the gospel . . .
to the only wise God be glory forevermore through Jesus Christ.
Romans 16: 25 & 27

That He would continue to strengthen me and He will get the glory.
Please pray for my emotions today. I am hurting.
Kate

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Kate,
I am with you in prayer right now.
Lord, grant Kate strength for the journey. Help her this day, this moment. Encourage her heart. Give her a glimpse into your heart, your love for her.

Remember his promise from Isaiah 43. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. . .

Sara

Jen Peskorse said...

Kate-
I have not posted a comment in quite some time- although prayer for you and your family have been often. I just got back from dropping Courtney (the girl you met at my house) at Mercy Ministries in Nashville- she, like you, is on a journey that involves the unknown- but she is convinced that God is her strength and her song.Courtney is praying for you, Kate- she is thankful to have met you and your boys and to pray for your family! What encouragement can I offer you from God's word as you struggle with the reality of the loss of hair?
I lift up my eyes to you, to you whose throne is in heaven. As the eyes of a slave look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a maid look to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the Lord our God, til he shows us his mercy. Psalm 123:1-2
Look up, Kate, and keep looking up-He is merciful and He cares about YOU- Love in Christ- Jen Peskorse

Anonymous said...

Dear Kate,
In the midst of a busy morning, I felt compelled to check your blog, and I'm so glad I did!
My heart is SO heavy for you as I pray for you right now, knowing you are struggling.

I will pray throughout the day today for your emotions, for comfort, and for some encouragement in the darkness.

"In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and He answered by setting me free. The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man (cancer) do to me? The Lord is with me; He is my helper. I will look in triumph on my enemies. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.... I was pushed back and about to fall, but the Lord helped me. The Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation."
Psalm 118:5-7,13-14

I love you, Kate, and I'm with you at the throne of grace, praying.
Tiffani Gibbs

Anonymous said...

Kate:

I just logged onto your blog before I get Arwen ready for her integrated preschool. Just know that we are sending hugs and "lovies" here from Indiana. You all continue to be in our thoughts and prayers. I know this doesn't seem fair and can only imagine how upsetting and painful this is. We all have at least one outside beauty that we know is ours/ makes us stand out or that stands out and we love about ourselves and it isn't fair when it is taken away from us in such a short time. I pray that the loss will be minimal and that God allows you to greive your loss.

It is hard when you are the mommy taking care of everyone else to take even 5 minutes for yourself to have a good cry or to deal with what you need to deal with at that moment in time. We love you Kate! I'm sorry you are having to go through this. Please remember you are never alone, you always have God's loving arms around you and you have many friends and family who would be there in a heartbeat for you! I know there isn't anything I can really say to "make it all better", I wanted to let you know you are loved and thought of often and you are truly a beautiful person.
Danielle

Anonymous said...

Kate

I have been following your blog for quite some time now and have witten a few times. I read your blog today and my heart goes out to you. But I think even more, I don't know you and you don't know me, but just from reading what you write about yourself (you're really funny and silly) and your boys and husband, you sound like a beautiful person. I know for a woman this must be difficult, but try to focus on life and how great it is to be there for your boys and husband (hair or not). You seem to be a really joyful person - don't let this rob you of your joy (don't let the devil win). I saw the picture of you and your boys and you have a beautiful face and smile. And even more, it seems you have a beautiful heart. That's what shows the most.

I know we all have difficult moments, and it seems this is a big one for you, but when you're feeling down, think of what mattes most: your husband, your boys and your faith. You seem to be an awesome wife and mother and a wonderful woman of faith! You've got THE LORD and He is victorious!!!

THANK YOU for being such a great inspiration to us all out there.

In His loving arms to hold you and protect you. My family and I will continue to pray for you and your family.

Marilyn McDonald said...

Kate--
I may not be picturing things correctly, but would it help to part your hair differently and comb over the thinning area? What about a partial hairpiece just for the front--lots of ladies get them when thinning hair (due to aging) leaves them flat in front.

I know it doesn't seem so now, but try thinking of this as a "light and momentary trial," one that will pass with time. As so many of your friends have pointed out, you have a much more lasting beauty inside: "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (2 Peter 3:3-4)
Love,
Marilyn

Anonymous said...

Kate,
A big hug to you today. Headbands can be fun and beautifully feminine. Scarves and Hats too. Having most of your hair as usual will help I'd think.
Much love,
Grammy C
Carol

Anonymous said...

Kate,

Praying for you, and wishing there was something I could do to lessen this burden of grief for you.

Erika

Aunt Julie said...

Kate,
Remember just like men in the military who receive metals for their courage and honor, this is your Badge! Remember that Baldness or Baldspots are beautiful! SO WIPE AWAY THOSE TEARS, HOLD YOUR HEAD UP HIGH AND WEAR IT PROUD!
Jul

Marcie said...

Kate-Once again, thank you for sharing your journey with all of us. I continue to pray for you and your family. You are often on my heart.

Practically, I wonder why you will need to cut it very short to match the growth. If you can cover up the bald spots, can't you cover up the uneven spots for awhile, too? Plus, wouldn't it be warmer to keep your hair longer now?

That said, I honestly think that you would look great with very short or no hair. I heard several people say how radiantly beautiful you looked the day of the Thanksgiving Feast at the boys school. (I kept the nursery that day.) That beauty comes from the Lord shining through you. He is with you and will shine in you hair or no hair. Hope you are encouraged this evening. Stay warm with this icy storm.

Anonymous said...

What Cancer Cannot Do

It cannot cripple love

It cannot shatter hope

It cannot corrode faith

It cannot destroy peace

It cannot kill friendships

It cannot suppress memories

It cannot silence courage

It cannot invade the soul

It cannot steal eternal life

It cannot conquer the spirit

...unless you allow it.

Thoughts become things, choose the good ones.

Anonymous said...

Martha writes:
When I was 12 I had to light the pilot in our furnace and enough gas had collected that when I struck the match there was a flash and my hair, eyebrows, eyelashes were singed and crumbly and then gone. At 12 I thought it was so bad that I lost all my hair, but GOD saved me from burns to my face, eyes, neck etc. I wore scarves and bandanas when no one knew or wore them. When my hair grew back I missed the style of having been different.
You are beautiful from the inside and the outside is only wrapping. Your eyes, your smile will be even more noticeable because you have GOD within. Take this step with HIM and know that we all are praying for peace and comfort for you and your family. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOURS. Jan 13, 2007